What does online feel like (day 105)

I had an interesting discussion with Miles today about what the feeling of being online.  I've been thinking about this a lot lately because of my self-surveillance project that snaps a picture of my desktop every 15 minutes on all 3 of my screens if they are active (and sometimes my iPhone too, though that is not automatic).   I've now collected close to 500 screenshots and looking at them in a fast (10 screenshots/second) sequence it doesn't even get close to the feeling of being online.  I'm going to investigate varying the duration of each frame by random amounts and see how that changes things.  I've added a bit of blur to the movie for privacy but here is what the movie for one my screens looks like for now:


226 screenshots (test) from Maria Lantin on Vimeo.

The feeling of being online is hard to describe.  It's not embodied but it can feel vast and rich.  It sometimes feels social but sometimes anxious.  Much of my time is spent processing the information that is coming at me (the social network as recommendation engine).   Making decisions about this information seems to be the source of a low grade anxiety stemming from a reluctance to spend time and the fear of missing out (FOMO).  There are moments of relaxation into a time commitment such as watching a show, scanning family albums, or programming an application.  There are quick smiles like interesting pictures in twitter.  There are lots of interruptions, little blips and popups.  Email anxiety is never far but seems to ebb and flow depending on time of day and how much the physical world needs my attention.  There is a both a satisfaction to answering email and an anxiety about the conversation progressing too quickly from there.  There are moments of boredom when there is not enough will to separate from the online but not enough interest to continue (the feed has slowed and the stand-bys are exhausted).  There is definitely a feeling of being in the flow of information but it is usually interrupted by having to click or type which brings me back to the screen.  A bit like being into a novel and someone asking you a question about work.

The more I think about it the more the rhythm seems to be important.  I'll see about adding different timings.   I also thought about doing a character recognition scan which would give me a data set to maybe assign an emotional 'score' to an image (many of my screenshots are mostly text).  Either way I'd like to play around with adding an emotional curve which can then be mapped the lung breathing pattern.

A song for this post.

Feel the lungs (day 59)

Today I had lunch with Joy James and we talked about the Breath I/O project.  She asked me some interesting questions about the type of affect we would like the piece to have.  Why do what we are doing?  How will people feel the experience of the lungs and the video and the sound and the interface?  As she was talking and asking questions I could feel my mind going from the how to the why.  I am so often preoccupied with the technical details of doing something.   It felt nice to speak of the audience, to picture them in the room,  to imagine the sounds they might hear.  At first I pictured only one person entering a large dark room (the mocap studio actually) where the sound was louder than the picture.  The sounds were enveloping, breath like, rhythmic and calm.  There are several places to sit down near the ground and in front of each seat there is an object, each one different.  The lungs are in a chorus formation breathing in sync, the video interchanges between them.  The person picks up an object and holds it.  One of the lungs gradually takes on more importance visually and the video is more consistent and clear.  The sound of the video is heard over the breath.  The singled out lungs have more personality and are not so in sync with the rest of the chorus which has faded to the background.  The lungs are reacting to the video that is playing within them, sometimes sighing, sometimes coughing, sometimes fast breathing, sometimes deep breathing.   The object vibrates in a association with the lungs.   When more objects are picked up more lungs approach and start to interact with each other and the objects. 

The feeling of the environment to be calm and conducive to a reflection on the bittersweet nature of life,  the life cycles, the exchanges we have with people, the constant give and take of life.  The preciousness and sadness of being human.  The joy of movement and breath, of health.

Thanks for the talk Joy.

A song for this post.